Of Sex and Automail

Please Note- This fic has been rated Mature for a reason! It contains graphic sexual references/conversations, homosexual sex, violence and loads of swearing and generally grown up situations. Please adhere to the age of consent for your country. I take no responsibility for those who don't.

I do not own the copyright on these characters. I get no money for writing about them. It's purely an act of worship (and lust) so please don't sue me. I don't have any money anyway.

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Envy was bored. He wound one long strand of hair around his sharp fingers and sighed. Afternoon was creeping over the city and he had done nothing all day, hurt no one, tormented no one.

So very bored.

True, he could just go out and find a random member of the public to play with but Envy had always preferred a connection with his victims, a knowledge of them, of their dreams and desires. It was more fun that way, like destroying something that a lot of work had been put into rather than some cheap little toy. Without a doubt his all time favourite victim was Edward Elric but the blonde bastard was hundreds of miles away and currently subject to problems that Envy had no role in, sadly.

However, it occurred to him that there were ways to screw with Elric without actually being anywhere near him. An escapade unravelled itself in Envy’s twisted brain, laid itself out in glittering colour and detail. So simple, so easy and such fun...

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From the first moment of stepping into the building Envy felt his counterfeit heart pounding with excitement, with joyful rage. Just appearing to be Edward Elric changed the world around him, changed how people treated him, looked at him. Of course to some extent it was always like that. The world was so utterly obsessed with appearances, with what it saw, never trying to venture beneath the surface and surfaces were things that Envy had complete control over. Yet, with Edward Elric it was...more. Elric, with his hands thrust into his pockets, his clothes moving like they were a part of his skin, that sardonic brown eyed gaze.

The bastard. Envy hated him so much that hit made him shiver, hated the way the world moved aside for him, hated the way his plaited blonde hair only made him more masculine, more desirable and, worst of all, Edward’s complete ignorance of what he was doing to everyone. Envy had watched him so many times, more times by a thousand than Elric was aware of. Envy often watched him with his eyes intent, trying to draw him inside, to take back the stolen life. Elric was a living reproach against the universe, against Hohenheim; he was everything that Envy should have been.

Arriving in Roy Mustang’s office Envy brushed aside Hawkeye with easy strength of will. Elric himself would have charmed her but that was not a skill that Envy possessed. He couldn’t even imitate it, no matter how hard he tried. It irritated him, Even insane little Wrath had charm. Roy looked up at Ed/Envy,

“Elric, I thought you were,”

“Never mind where I am meant to be, here I am! Buy me dinner.” Envy grinned.

Roy looked bemused as well he might. This was not how conversations with Elric usually went. It wasn’t that long ago that Ed had barely been able to manage basic civility to his superior. Sloth had told Envy all about it, more than once, because they amused her in their circling machismo. She had heard about every one of their spats and of course the fight was already legend. Even now, while a more mature Elric just managed to treat Mustang with a reluctant respect, it was evident to all that trust had not been gained and might never be. So a request for dinner was bizarre.

Envy watched Roy trying to figure it out. Mustang had a very closed face. Envy was a connoisseur of faces and Roy always looked as though his emotions were elsewhere, very much far away. A face like that was a shield. There were dark things behind it.

The moment was not without its tension, at least as far as Envy was concerned. Since the death of Hughes it had become possible to guess who they, the homunculi, were and what abilities they might have. If only people would think about it and stop being so bloody blind. Mustang in particular must have at least the beginnings of suspicion. What if he opened his eyes and saw that it was not Edward stood in front of him?

“Alright,” Mustang said, with a little shrug that suggested that he had given up trying to understand Edward years ago, “Let’s go.”

Hawkeye watched them leave with that hungry look that she thought no one noticed. ‘Roy will never see you that way,’ Envy thought, with a shot of pleasure, ‘not in the way that you want. You will have to hear about his affairs with other women forever. You will never be one of them.’ This reflection on Hawkeye’s misery put Envy into a briefly excellent mood.

All of his moods were brief.

“Where is Al?” Mustang asked, as they headed out of the vast complex towards a pub favoured by the military. Mustang looked at Envy/Ed sidelong. He sensed that somehow things weren’t right but couldn’t understand why. Envy encountered that a lot.

“He’s busy,” Envy said, flatly. Elric rarely elaborated on the brothers’ plans to anyone so Mustang accepted this without a murmur. Al, Envy thought, the nauseatingly sweet brother; just listening to that loving voice put Envy in danger of a diabetic coma. But somehow Al had rarely incited the loathing that Edward did. Al, Envy could cope with. It was Edward that had stolen his life, the poisonous little midget.

These recollections nearly killed Envy’s buzz so he took steps to restore it. As they sat at a greasy table and drank beer Envy deliberately collided his leg with Mustang’s. Bang on cue Mustang jumped. It was almost imperceptible but Envy had sharp eyes in any body. He suppressed a smile and sat back in his chair in that way that Edward had, as if half in and half out of the conversation. As if part of his mind was on higher matters. Mustang recovered magnificently and they ordered dinner.

“So,” the soldier said, at last, “What can I do for you Edward? It’s not like you to want to go out.”

It was true that Edward had no sense of fun, or at least not the kind of fun that Envy had in mind.

“Can’t I do something just because I feel like it?” He smiled.

“You’re usually more focussed than that,” Mustang observed.

“Too focussed?”

“Perhaps, for someone so young.”

“My flesh may be eighteen but my mind is much older. It’s been to more places than most peoples’.”

Mustang nodded. Envy sensed that he too had grown up fast. Edward had been to horrors that humans should not see and Mustang had done things that he was clearly haunted by. They really had a lot in common. Maybe that was why they were always fighting.

“Al is holding the fort. I thought that I should let loose for once. Before I explode or die of boredom.”

“I wouldn’t call your life boring,” Mustang exclaimed, “Not by any stretch of the imagination.”

“Yeah, well, you only ever hear about the busy bits. The rest is not exactly pleasurable.”

Envy lingered on the last word and enjoyed Roy’s consequent increase in discomfort. Envy meanwhile was debating with himself about how to seduce this soldier. Everyone knew about his endless women, even Sloth was occasionally impressed by Roy’s success in this field. ‘Give me back my girlfriend!’ was the universal cry, sent up by appalled, cuckolded colleagues. It was possible, although Envy was reluctant to consider it, that it would not be possible for Edward to seduce Roy. But at the very least Envy could make their working relationship very awkward and the beauty of it was that Elric would probably never even know why.

They ate thoughtfully. No doubt Mustang was thinking about Elric’s uncharacteristic behaviour. Envy pretended to enjoy his food. Lust often said that when they were human they would be able to find pleasure in human things, family, work, sleep, food. But Envy had never understood why the others would want to be human. Why lose all their powers, all their strength and become like everything else, half dead already? Why would Envy desire that? True, he did want Elric’s life but only in that he wanted to kill him so that he could break Hohenheim’s heart. He didn’t want to be Edward, as such. Not if it brought human frailties with it.

“Your thoughts are miles away,” Mustang observed, finishing his food.

Envy looked down at ‘his’ body and grinned.

“No, they are actually very close to home. Let’s get drunk.”

Not for the first time that evening Mustang looked surprised but he didn’t object. When the drinks arrived Envy noticed that his companion drank in just the way that he had expected, like a man who had secrets to forget. Envy didn’t really care what demons Mustang drowned with whiskey as long as it also melted his inhibitions. Envy moved ‘his’ Automail leg and slid it against Roy’s. Roy looked straight at him then as if to say, ‘what the fuck are you doing?’ but he was caught in an age old trap. Asking such a question meant admitting that he had noticed the movement in the first place. Most men pretended not to notice such things until they had no choice. After all, what if it had been accidental?

Envy waited until they were a few more drinks down the road before he tried anything else. And to think, only a few hours ago he had been bored...

Twelve drinks later and Envy was impressed. Not only was Mustang not horizontal and unconscious but he wasn’t very bleary eyed either and now he was pressing his own leg up against ‘Ed’s’. His eyes were defiant. He was clearly thinking, ‘if this isn’t what you are after you are going to have to say.’ Envy replied by rubbing his booted foot slowly up Roy’s leg. All the while Envy kept Roy’s gaze and grinned when the soldier tensed.

Mustang stood up abruptly, nearly knocking over the table. For a moment Envy feared that he had misjudged the situation but then,

“Let’s take this somewhere else, shall we?” Roy suggested, admirably calmly.

Envy stood up obediently and they paid and left. Envy was violently forcing down a powerful urge to snigger. Mustang did want Elric after all. Who would have thought it? Well, apart from Envy but he thought that sort of thing about everybody. A short taxi ride took them to Roy’s home, although Envy hesitated to call it that because when they turned on the living room light it was hardly homely. There were barely any personal objects, no photographs, no novels, nothing. Even the furniture had a military issue look to it. It was all plain, functional, dead. If Lust thought that humans were more truly alive than homunculi, then she was sorely mistaken.

But Envy didn’t have much chance to consider this because Roy slammed the door and exclaimed,

“What the hell are you up to?”

“Like you don’t want it?” Envy shrugged, “Why bring me here otherwise? Just to yell at me? You could have yelled at me in the street.”

Envy advanced on Roy. For the first time the soldier looked almost afraid. Envy smiled and placed his hands on Roy’s chest, palms down, almost calming in posture, although that was far from the effect. Roy began to breath fast. Envy stood so that bodies were suddenly, shockingly pressed together. Roy gasped.

“It’s only sex, Mustang, it doesn’t have to mean anything,” Envy assured him.

Roy looked at him incredulously so Envy kissed him. The soldier’s lips were warm and they tasted of whiskey. The excitement that had been building in Envy all evening spiked and he sank against Roy, warm flesh to warm flesh, beating heart to beating heart. Even if only one of them was truly beating.

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As soon as Mustang was asleep Envy would leave. His work was done here and he was already losing interest a little. He listened to Roy’s breath begin to slow and he indulged in fantasies about what would happen the next time Edward happened to meet Roy. Would Roy say something, try to touch him, try to kiss him? When would Roy realise that something was wrong? When Edward kicked the crap out of him? Either way it would be a terrible day for Elric when he saw what must have happened. He would figure it out; he would know that it was Envy. Elric was many things but stupid wasn’t one of them. What would it be like when he had to explain it to Roy?

All that Envy wished was that he could be there to see it.