Ouch. Poor Youji. The final paragraph seems a little rough around the edges in comparison with the overall story which flows quite nicely.
I'm not a fan of drabbles as they--even decent ones like yours-- leave me feeling disastified. When reading I prefer my anecdotes within stories and not stand alone. Perhaps you could put all of yours in a collection as opposed to treating them all as one fic... I think they would be more tempting to read that way.
